How to Shop More Consciously: A Practical Guide to Sustainable, Year-Round Consumption
My approach to shopping now seems so far removed from 12-year-old me, sat cross-legged in front of an Argos catalogue, circling the Barbie Dream House and electronic diary. Back then, it had never crossed my mind how those toys were made, who made them, or whether they had an environmental cost. All I cared about was that they turned up at my house, wrapped and waiting.
It’s been a journey getting to a place where I really care about what gets brought into our home. It’s taken hours of research and many learnings, but for the most part—money saved and a house full of clothes, toys, and homewares that hold stories that are not just our own. But just because I’ve come to love another way of shopping—one that values people and the planet—doesn’t mean everyone around me shares those values (including my daughter, especially when she’s coveting the singing and dancing Frozen doll her friend has at nursery!).
To help you embrace more mindful habits year-round, here are a few ways to navigate buying more responsibly and some thoughts on gradually shifting shopping habits altogether.
Get Secondhand Savvy
I’ve almost always been able to find what I need secondhand—yes, bras, yes, shoes, yes, balloons! Why not try searching for what your kids may be asking for on a secondhand platform first? Any time of year is a great time to start, and more responsible shopping often takes a little longer—so allow yourself some extra time if you’re new to it.
Start by setting alerts on the platforms you use so that if something specific you’re looking for comes up, you’ll be notified—this helps cut down on endless searching and scrolling. If you’re after something expensive and hoping for a bargain, try using fatfingers.com to find misspelled listings that are less likely to end in a bidding war. You can also check out platforms like @reboxed if you're looking for barely used secondhand devices.
Can’t find what you need at first? Do a shoutout on a local Facebook group, ask directly in charity shops, or simply... wait a little. I started shopping secondhand on eBay at 14 and have learned a lot—it may feel daunting at first, but it’s so worth it, and soon enough, you’ll catch the bug!
More on this here: 5 Tips to Shopping Secondhand.
Be Smart About Buying New
While 80% of what we buy as a family is secondhand, the 20% that’s new is an opportunity to “vote with our money”—supporting companies that pay fair wages and consider their environmental impact. Look out for terms like Fair Trade, OEKO-TEX certified, ECOCERT, or GOTS certified. These aren’t perfect, but they’re a good starting point.
Also, be wary of buzzwords like “eco” or “natural,” which can sometimes be just clever marketing. Dig a little deeper to find brands doing the work behind the words.
Have the Hard Conversations
For those trying to live more consciously, gift-giving—especially around birthdays, holidays, or celebrations—can be a tricky one. We can control what we bring into our home, but not always what others want to give. If you want to see a change in how people gift, it often takes a brave conversation, a gentle boundary, or simply sharing your values (which can be VERY hard).
As a family, we create gift lists (you can do this on gifthero and other sites) which allows us to suggest items we actually need or that the kids have asked for. You could also ask loved ones to stick to homemade or secondhand gifts—or suggest pooling funds toward one meaningful gift.
We’ve also had to have some tough conversations with our daughter. Sometimes we need to say no to a request, and explain why. One of the phrases we use a lot is: “In our family, we…” It’s a gentle way to explain that every family has its own rules, values, and rhythms—and this is how we choose to live in ours. It helps when kids start comparing or asking why their friends are getting the latest thing right away.
Buying more responsibly doesn’t mean our kids miss out. It just means they understand why we make the choices we do—and that they’re part of the journey too.
Grow Thankfulness
This one takes time. Culture teaches us to consume—but we can teach our kids to be thankful. One way is by encouraging them to think beyond themselves. Maybe it’s picking something for the food bank during the weekly shop (many supermarkets have donation points), or choosing to bless someone—a note for the postie, sponsoring a child, or helping a neighbour.
We also have a one-in, one-out policy—when something new comes in, something old goes out. It helps prevent clutter, but also encourages generosity and reflection. We talk about money too. Our daughter knows that money is earned, and when she asks for something, we’ll often say, “Let’s talk about it again closer to the celebration,” so we can make a thoughtful decision together.
Lose the Stigma
Secondhand is too often associated with being “dirty” or “broken”—and that stigma stops people from embracing it. But secondhand is NOT second-best. Our daughter calls the charity shop a toy shop—because that’s all she’s ever known!
Highlight the stories that come with secondhand items. Last year, we gifted her a dollhouse from a family who had written a note about how much they loved it, but had outgrown it. She loved imagining who they were. If secondhand feels hard for you, start with secondhand-new—items that have never been used. Look for terms like BNIB (brand new in box), BNWT (brand new with tags), or worn once.
Do Things Differently
There are lots of ways to rethink gifting and buying:
Try the rule of four: something you want, something you need, something to wear, and something to read.
Wrap up toys your kids already have and present them in a new way.
Repurpose something already in your home into a gift.
Set budgets, do a gift round-robin, or decide on family experience days instead.
Find what works for your family, not someone else’s. Shopping more responsibly starts with one choice, big or small. And remember to keep it joyful—bring your kids along for the ride. Before you know it, they might just lead the way.